


You had Me at We

by CAPSING



Category: Venom (Movie 2018)
Genre: Alien Mindset, Animal Death, Eddie is Venom's type, Introspection, Other, Possessive Behavior, Venom's POV, Whichever Disturbing Themes that Appeared in the Movie, everything is very vague and confusing, Перевод на русский | Translation in Russian
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-26
Updated: 2018-10-26
Packaged: 2019-08-07 22:18:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16417040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CAPSING/pseuds/CAPSING
Summary: They are not compatible with humans.But humans are notEddie.(Venom’s perspective - from being captured to being reunited.)





	You had Me at We

**Author's Note:**

> Watched the movie yesterday, it was a lot of fun! Posting this before I have a chance to add this to my WIPs.
> 
> Also shoutout to ragnjarok, [whose art made me want to watch this movie.](https://twitter.com/ragnjarok/status/1048762168987045888)
> 
> Edit: Changed category from 'M/M' to 'Other' after browsing through the tag. Seemed more appropriate.  
> Edit March 2019: Huge Thank You to [Retrospective Neglect](https://retrospective-neglect.tumblr.com/) for betaing this piece! Pointing out my mistakes and giving helpful suggestions to correct them :) ♥  
> *  
> Now [translated to Russian](https://ficbook.net/readfic/7601710), by the amazing [chainsmoking](https://archiveofourown.org/users/chainsmoking/pseuds/chainsmoking)! ♥ Thank you SO MUCH!

This is wrong.

This is wrong.

This is–

It can’t–

It can’t touch. It can’t touch the hosts. But tHE hoSTs aRe rigHT THERE–

But outside the hosts is death. It’s death and it’s already weak, weaker than it had ever been. It continues wasting energy to try and _touch_ , but it can’t, it can’t because everything is  _wrong–_

it

 

it tries not to

 

it tries

 

 

it doesn’t help.

* * *

When it stops being wrong, it starts creeping towards death.

It can finally move, and is almost overwhelmed with a the sense of a hoST A HOSTHOSTHOSTMINEHOSTMI–

Even before touching it, it knows the host is _wrong_. It’s wrong like everything it experienced since the _wrong_ started, but it can’t help it; being without a host is worse than _wrong_ , it can’t go back to it, it can’t it can’t can’t can’t can’t–

The host is small, too small and tight to fit; it’s weak and its molecules grate the symbiote that awful way forced hosts tend to, when it can feel they would not last and they cling too harshly, unsure of how to combine, how to synchronize, aware it would not last –

It feels its heart thrumming in a staccato that feels like it shouldn’t, it shouldn’t be –

 

It’s thrown out of the host as it explodes.

Around it, sound waves hum.

* * *

 

With each new host, it grows more desperate.

It tries not to, but they are not meant to exist without a host; they can’t operate as well; they can’t concentrate as well. They need the stability of a host to sort themselves out; it doesn’t know why it does what it does, only that there’s a purpose to it, a baser, lesser trait it has to follow to survive.

Each time, it clings to the host slightly more forcefully.

Each time, it’s rejected – violently, messily, with no time to try and sort itself out.

Each time, when the host dies, they feel themselves growing fainter. Each time they’re thrown out, it takes something from them; it takes without giving.

It just _takes_.

Somewhere in them, they’re aware, that eventually, this wrongness would end them.

 

(Somewhere in them, there’s thin threads of consciousness forming into something they cannot yet name.)

* * *

 

Then the hosts _change_.

It can’t understand how, but they’re _bigger_.

It doesn’t help, that they’re bigger.

Their cells are still slippery, ungraspable; still explode when it tries to ease into them. They’re like scalding brightness that it must slither into, with no safe crevice to hide in.

In the first few attempts, it doesn’t even try communicating with the hosts; it just tries working out how to function, how not to be thrown out again to a toxic world that’s _wrong_.

When it fails, it has no choice but start feeding off of them; it’s _wrong_ but it’s desperate. They’re all dying anyway, and it is so _hungry_. It didn’t know it before, couldn’t name it, but now it knows it’s _starving_ , had been for more time than ever before.

It knows the others are close; it feels them.

They’re not doing any better.

* * *

It’s twelfth host – it tries to communicate with.

It learnt numbers from their brain.

It likes numbers.

 

The host ends up scratching their ears bloody, trying to shut it up.

 

Before they die, it finally realizes what it’s feeling.

(It was _lonely_ , but it’s not going to remember it, not until– )

* * *

It’s thirty-seventh host, it can finally retain itself, gather bits of pieces of what it knows, other than it’s all _wrong._ It knows what _voices_ are, now, though it’s difficult to differentiate them; it knows one of the empty hosts is keeping them all caged in here.

 

It knows it’s killing its host.

 

It tries doing it in the slowest manner it can. 

* * *

 

Its one-hundredth and one host is called _Maria_.

It remembers it has a name too.

Maria speaks a lot, but doesn’t like moving. Maria sits a lot, even since it tried moving her legs.

It doesn’t try moving Maria, or speaking.

It tries remembering its name, instead.

 

* * *

 

Then –

 

* * *

 

THEN –

 

* * *

 

It seems too good, too _right_ , to actually be happening. There’s a host outside of the cage– a host darker than the deepest spaces in the universe, a host that calls it like nothing else ever did.

 

It

WANTS–

 

* * *

It doesn’t know what to do when the barrier breaks. It seems impossible it is not with this host– that they are APART _–_

It tries mashing into it with Maria, but the host struggles– and it can’t do that, it caN’T BECAUSE IT WANTS AND IT CAN’T–

* * *

 

Sinking into the host makes it _right_ , and Venom can now _remember_.

It remembers it’s in a cage – so it runs away.

It remembers twelve – so it keeps quiet.

It remembers –

It remembers nothing like _Eddie._

Not ever.

* * *

 

 

Then it remembers.

It remembers it’s –

 

 

 

“ **HUNGRY**.” It tells Eddie when they’re next to so many readily available meals.

 

 

Eddie doesn’t feed them

So Venom must.

* * *

It knows it harmed Eddie, when they merged. It didn’t mean to, but it became too harsh, too desperate, to meld together properly. The host’s body becomes unwell, and Venom tries sorting it out. It’s the first body it actively tried to keep alive on this planet, and Venom itself has not yet recovered from when everything was _wrong_.

Fixing the host is taking a lot of resources, and it’s hard when the fuel it's given is solely rotting corpses covered in chemicals, and with the host’s digestive system being so _weak_ it can barely process anything at all.

It’s the need to keep this host that distracts it from anything until they’re put into _the machine_ –

It understands it can no longer avoid its host.

* * *

 

Eddie doesn’t respond well to their introduction.

But Eddie also keeps from clawing Eddie’s ears out.

It’s progress.

* * *

 

 Then Eddie calls Venom a _parasite._

It’s desperation, not anger, that takes over. The host _must never know_ what Venom did when it was _wrong._ That was _before Eddie_ , that was _before_ and Venom would never do that–

Venom forces Eddie to apologize, even when it knows Eddie is in the right–

Because Eddie _must never know_ , must never even _suspect_ –

Because Venom WANTS–

It doesn’t know what Eddie wants yet; it tried offering him to do things together, to make all the other empty hosts into piles, like it has seen Eddie do with papers and dishes.

Eddie must want something– Venom just needs more time to find out what–

Eddie must want something–

 

But no one wants a _parasite_.

* * *

 

Eddie apologizes.

 

Venom tries something different, after saving Eddie.

“What the hell are you?” Eddie asks, with Eddie’s soft host flesh and tender vocal cords that Venom can feel vibrating in the host’s thin neck.

“ **I am Venom** –”, it articulates slowly, to make sure the host’s soft brain understands, “ – **and you are _mine_.** ”

“You bit somebody’s head off,” Eddie says, still not fully grasping Venom’s claim.

“ **Fuel for the tank** ,” Venom replies, agitated that Eddie is fixated on _food_ instead of on what it’s saying. “ **Think of yourself as my ride** ”, it pulls the conversation back to where it’s meant to go.

“Where are we goin’?” Eddie asks, and Venom pulls itself upwards, having difficulties to mask its surprise.

 

The host just–

Eddie just–

Eddie just called them _WE._

 

“ **We** –“ Venom repeats, tongue growing heavier in its mouth, “– **need to go to Drake’s rockets**.”

“Are you– are you gonna eat anybody’s else?”

Venom can’t help the rattling sound that spews out, which Eddie thinks of like a cat’s purr. Referring to Venom in a singular manner can’t erase that tHE HOST JUST CALLED THEM A ‘WE’–

“ **Most likely** ”, it tells Eddie, content that Eddie wishes to communicate– wishes to understand their shared future. “ **This is why We are here** ”, it continues, having difficulty to stop the thrill of _Them_.

It has much more to lose now.

It can’t let Eddie interfere with their future.

“ **Cooperate, and you just might survive** ”, it threatens its host, lying. “ **That is the deal.** ”

 

As if there’s any chance it would let anything harm _them._

* * *

 

Humans are very fragile, in their truths. When one of them tells Eddie that Venom is harming their body, it can sense what’s about to happen. Eddie feels a depth of emotions that Venom had never shared with another, that hurts worse than the MRI or from being yanked from a disposable host.

When they’re ripped apart, Venom can’t hear Eddie, but it feels the vibrations of Eddie’s voice. It tries to mend what seems splintered worse than Eddie’s delicate bones – but it’s back to when it was _wrong_ , and it feels as Eddie grows fainter and fainter and there’s _nothing_ but Venom–

 _NoThInG_ –

 

* * *

 

But this time, it has _Eddie_.

 

* * *

 

It feels something it never felt before; it doesn’t know what to name it. It has always done things to survive. But now it's  _different_. Now Eddie has to survive, for there to be a _We_.

 _We_ feels more important. More essential than it feels about itself. It already feels it can’t just think about itself, anymore; Eddie’s host’s brain takes longer to understand _them_ , but Venom’s already sunken too deep into its host. Being ripped apart only makes it more apparent –

Eddie must survive, for there to be a _We_.

Eddie _must_ survive.

 

And when confronting Riot –

Venom would probably not.

 

It doesn’t tell it to Eddie, not in quite those words – but it knows _they_ might die, so _Eddie_ may live.

It doesn’t seem terribly important.

 

After all, living without Eddie is worse than death.

Worse than anything.

Even worse than being in the MRI for all eternity.

(That’s the closest thing to Hell Venom can picture, in their mind.)

 

* * *

They’re trudging along the forest. They haven’t even finished eating properly, those heads all wasted on the temporary host that reminded Venom humans aren’t good for much but for their crunchy skulls and tasty brains. It feels Eddie is still as fragile as when they were torn apart, still unsure of _them_.

It tries fixing, even if it’s not sure they would be together for much longer.

 

“ **Here, _we_ could be more** – “

“Excuse me?” Eddie intervenes, and it stings, a little, when it’s clear Eddie still hasn’t quite forgiven it, using a _me._ Venom, still unnerved, tries taunting its host back, petty and anxious with Riot in their uncertain future.

“ **– and _I’m_ getting to like it here.**”

“Oh, _you_ like _us_ now, d’ya?” Eddie rants, and Venom catches as its host keeps calling _them_ – _us –_ countering, unaware, each time Venom fails to call _them_ as it should.

It strengthens its resolve.

“ **However, there would be nothing left to like if _we_ don’t stop that rocket** – “

 

* * *

Fire and noise both are a messy way to die.

Humans are flammable, just like symbiotes.

And Venom can’t let Eddie _burn_.

* * *

 

It doesn’t know how it makes it back to Eddie, barely a wisp of itself.

Eddie's body lets it sink into it like the haven it always was, soothing against its cells, beckoning to its touches.

 

“Venom,” Eddie says, and their eyes feel strange and prickly.

It can’t quite say anything yet. Thoughts and words are too much.

Eddie feeds them.

Eddie feeds them a lot.

Eddie talks to them, and thinks at them, for a very long time.

 

“I’ve missed you,” Eddie says out loud. “I’ve missed _us._ ”

Venom thrums, weakly, within their mind.

“We’re good together, you know?” Eddie speaks between spoonfuls, into their third brownie ice-cream tub, that makes their gums cold and aching. Eddie does that for them.

Venom sends a thin tendril to nudge at Eddie’s cheek, and Eddie leans into it, and their eyes feels strange again, with their view getting all muddled.

Eddie gets up, opens the freezer, and rips another container open.

 

* * *

 

“How are we doing today?” Eddie asks Venom in their mirror, hair messy and eyes bright. “Are we up to some conversations, yet?”

“ ** _We_ can do whatever _We_ want,** ” Venom purrs back, and the effort is certainly worth the result.

Eddie’s primitive brain pumps out joy which Venom laps at. When it's done, its tongue turns to lap the moisture that trickles down onto their cheeks.

 

They’re together now,

and they never stopped _wanting_.

 

**Author's Note:**

> All feedback is welcome and appreciated! ♥
> 
> (Guess who’s just been forced to undergo the CITI Program Social & Behavioral Research Basic Course to earn an ethics certificate?? That I bet those researchers in the movie didn’t have!)


End file.
